Wednesday, January 04, 2006

GENTICALLY MODIFIED GARGANTUAN BUNNY BOOTIES: A Lesson in Gauge

Warning: not for the faint of heart


(Please excuse Tacky Goodwill Sideboard warped by husband's genetic inability to use a COASTER. Great for knitting, though, with a spot for books and a handy shelf for that vintage Tupperware kit with knitting accessories. Sits next to the recliner with the wicked cool felted armchair covers--see tomorrows post when I actually feature a picture of said covers without any nekkid toddlers or a passel of screaming eight-year-old girls.)

Okay, boys and girls, here's another good lesson in gauge from Knitterhead, the Knitting Savant. Last year, there was a phenomenon at our church: everyone who got pregnant had a girl, and they had them all at about the same time--it was like an Orthodox litter, for goodness sakes. What is a knitter to do? A plethora of adorable babies and not near enough time to knit everyone a layette, ya know? (Not that I have a high productivity rate with the Lion King around, hell bent on impaling himself on my needles). So I purchased Zoe Mellor's Fifty Baby Bootees to Knit to curb my tendency to knit first and think later, which results in a series of disappointed individuals and a heckuva lot of UFO's. (I know, I know... ADD and gift knitting is a bad combination...)

So here's the lesson on gauge: Don't just go by the (@)#(*)(%&#)@#* label when looking for stitch per inch. Knit up that blasted annoying little 4 x 4 square. That way you won't end up with the following:

See the little blue line on the back of the book? That's the 6-9 months line! That's right! HUGE bootees, that the poor child won't wear until she's bloody 4! Arrrrrggggghhhh!!! Here's to that little voice in my head that said, "Why don't you just go by the picture?" Ohhh, no, for once I just HAD to follow the pattern.

The worst bit is that these little buggers are in Peter Pan Wendy (?) Velvet Touch, which is arguably my all-time favorite baby yarn (aside from Berocco's Plush) and covers a multitude of sins. In fact, you can't even see the stitches coming off a three, so how do you count the rows??? You have to hold it up to the light and stretch it out.

Anyway, I now have access to a digital camera on a regular basis, so watch and see the bootees get finished. Since I started them last January, I figured it's time to get them done... now that they are more than likely to FIT her... Thinking, of course, that a one-year-old has HUGE feet.

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