Thursday, January 19, 2006







WICKED FELTED ARMCHAIR COVERS

or
WHITE TRASH CHAIR DISGUISERS



As promised, the Wicked Felted Armchair Covers. Only knit up because I couldn't find burgandy-colored duct tape. Camo, Red, Green, your standard confederate Gray, Royal Blue, but no burgandy. What's the world coming to when your local Southern Wal-Mart doesn't carry the full selection? Almost makes me want to up and Yankiefy myself.


Mr. Jones was our somewhat ornery and small-minded neighbor. However, he was nice enough to give us his beat-up La-Z-Boy. Now being that I only subscribe to one magazine--Country Living--I never wanted a recliner. I think they are tacky beyond meaning.

But as I have had my way for 11 years, got the puppy eyes, and it was free, I thought, I can always knit armchair covers.

The first ones were disasterous. The second came out wavy around the edges (I used seed stitch instead of just i-cording them) but the result is pretty good, and much better than duct tape. I used Wool of the Andes from Knit Picks because folks, I just don't have the $75 for armchair covers when $30 with Knit Picks got me enough wool to make these covers, a pair of felted men's slippers and four skiens left over for a few bicycle covers. I have been told by someone who has forgotten more about felting than I'll ever learn to be wary of South American wools that sometimes they can pucker because they use small batches and it makes for inconsistent wool. But from what I can tell, it felted great and I have no complaints. It's also very nice just knit up--it's got a nice sheen and is really soft. I admit, I prefer Brown Sheep for a lot of felted projects, but WOTA is a really close second. The price just can't be beat. $1.79. Yep--no misnomer--$1.79. When you find yourself putting $40 into a small purse you're sending to your Aunt Emily in Scotland and know (from a purse that disappeared somewhere between here and Caeverendock Street in Prestwick) that it might not make it, you have to spend an hour round-trip in Memphis traffic to fetch the yarn in the first place--heck, there's no contest. I. Am. Still. Broke, people. (The Theology Major had decided to go back to college so that's broke + broke x broke / broke. You do the math.) I can make four for the same price and get it sent to my door within days. Although I'll miss a trip out and knitting in the shops with all the comraderie, with a two-year-old around, there's really no contest.

I used stick-on velcro to keep them in place and so far it has worked brilliantly!

Anyway, I digress. BEFORE:





SOOOoooooooooo very white trash.













AFTER: makes me look like a sauve knitter, n'est pas? (Let's celebrate: pass the cheese grits/pork rinds/Moon Pie and let's watch Jerry in our improved armchair).





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